What if?
by Loves-2-Sing
Summary: What if Ashley had never lost the baby?
1. Chapter 1

**My first fanfic ever! I hope you like it but im not sure if im going to continue it**

**I don't own the characters But I own this computer and I have a very active imagination. But seriously they all belong to the-n and to the creators of the show.**

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**What if?**

Chapter 1

she had been up all night. She layed awake listening to the sound

of the baby crying in the next room. There was nothing she could do. Ashley had

already fed her and she didn't need to be changed so why was she still crying? The

brunette was doing the best she could but she had school the next day and could

not pull another all nighter.

Needless to say the crying just got worse. When the brunette finally decided

to go and comfort her tiny infant the screaming stopped.

How did she get in this mess? Why is it only her fault? Noone points the

blame at the hot shot basketball star who got her pregnant. Why is she they one

that always had to take care of her? The words played in her head every

sleepless night and it always ended the same. _Because I love her and she is my_

_baby._


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

The nanny arrived late the next morining. Ashley had been all

ready for school and everything but could not leave until Janice was there.

Ashley's mother had hired Janice as soon as the baby was born that way she

never had to see her.

Ashley had to admit it was nice having her mother hire a nanny but Janice

was only there when Ashley went to school. The brunette was her mother and

swore that she would never have a full time nanny. She spent as much time with

her baby as possible and when she couldn't be there, the only thing on her mind

was her beautiful blue eyed joy.

Ashley arrived to school late and very tired. She had only had about an hour

of sleep the night before. She stopped at her locker to gather the books she would

need for her next class and that is when she felt somebody bump into her,

her hot coffee running down her hands and she was ready to snap.

However, the brunette looked up to see the most beautiful ocean blue

eyes looking back at her, she was speachless. She was amazed at the beautiful

blonde standing just a few inches from her face. " I'm so sorry " the blonde said

but the words never reached Ashley's ears. _She is so beautiful. She must be_

_new I know I would have noticed her._ The blonde blushed as she noticed brown

eyes scanning her from head to toe.

" I'm spencer Carlin " said the blonde offering her hand out to Ashley. With that

the brunette's brain started to function again. She reached out for Spencer's hand

and gave it a firm shake " Ashley. Ashley Davies. "

" Well Ashley I'm very sorry for bumping into you, these halls are crazy "

Spencer said in a very calm and adorable way. Ashley just smiled and nodded

knowing she could not form clear words. " Oh what an adorable baby " Spencer

pointed to the picture of the four month old baby girl Ashley forgot was hanging in her

locker. " her name is Jenna" answered the brunette. " Is she like your sister or

something? " " ...Or something... " Ashley replied. Just then the bell rang and

Spencer started to walk away Ashley however couldn't move. Looking over her

shoulder she heard the blonde say "I'll see you around I owe you a

coffee."

what do u think? Do you like it so far?


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you to everyone who reviewed the last 3 chapters. I'm sorry it took so long for me to update, but I was on vacation and now that I am back I will most likely post a new chapter everyday.**

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Chapter 3

Ashley's heart fluttered and her tummy was doing backflips

through the next three classes. When the bell rang for lunch Ashley more then

excited to go see Spencer. She thought since it was her first day she may need

someone to sit with. She stopped dead in her tracks when she saw Spencer sitting

with Madison and all the other cheerleaders. However there was a strange look on

her face like she wanted to be somewhere else.

Spencer's mind had been racing the whole day. She knew that as soon as her

hand touched Ashley's she felt a fire build up inside her. She had never felt

anything like this before and she knew she was in trouble. When the bell for lunch

rang she was led by Madison to the quad. She looked around as soon as she got

there but saw no sign of the brunette she had met this morning. She let out a soft

groan and joined Madison with about 20 other equally fake girls.

As soon as Ashley saw the blonde she tried to turn and walk away. It was too

late. She heard the voice she could not resist and waited for her to come closer.

When she finally approached Ashley felt a thin warm arm link with her's as she

was lead into the firey pit of death that is the cheerleader's table.

" Hey guys this is my friend Ashley " Madison looked her up and down and

said "sorry but we don't want your type here " " What type is that? " the fiesty

brunette asked when there was no answer she turned and walked away. Spencer

chased after her feeling more confused then she did before. _what did she mean_

_your type? why is Ashley different? could she be a... dare I say it... lesbian. No_

_that is just crazy... or is it?_ When she finally caught up to the girl that she was

chasing the blonde linked her arms with her again.

Spencer tried to use some calming words to make the girl feel better all she

could come up with was "hey come on lets go find somewhere to sit just us. ok?"

Ashley wanted to tell her to fuck off. She knew that Spencer would change if she

became a cheerleader. But all she could do was smile. _One look into those eyes_

_and she has me hooked_ . " how bout we get out of here and ditch

the rest of the day? " She knew it was a stretch but the brunette had to ask. " Well

I do still owe you a coffee so..."

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**Somebody e-mailed me yesterday and asked me how I came up with the idea to make Ashley have the baby. The truth is it was inspired by something that happened to me. My mother passed away almost 4 months ago and I wondered if things would have been different if I was never born, and then I thought about if things would be different if Ashley baby was born.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Thanks to everyone who review I hope you enjoy this chapter.**

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Chapter 4

The air conditioning in Ashley's car was up way to high but spencer

tried to ignore it. She somehow always felt warm when she was just near the

brunette that she had so quickly became attached to. She looked over at her

friend and took a mental note of every curve and line in her face. _She is_

_stunning... So beautiful._

_Why not just burn a hole in my face. Does she really think I can't feel her_

_eyes on me oh god her eyes those deep blue eyes...focus Ashley god it is just a_

_girl be cool just be cool..._ When she turned her head to face the blonde she

saw her head quickly turn causing a slight giggle to pass her lips.

Spencer looked over at the brunette again but this time she glanced over her

head noticing another picture of the same baby she saw earlier. She decided not

to ask it was none of her business and she would find the right time to ask her.

Once they arrived at the coffee shop Ashley parked the car and they both

got out. Spencer went to buy the coffees while Ashley spotted an open table near

the window.

They sat in a comfortable silence for what felt like forever untill one of them finally spoke

" So Spencer where did lived before moving out here to L.A? "

" Ohio in a small little city where I knew everyone "

"Wow thats like going from a little fish bowl to the Ocean"

"yea it is a little crazy here but we had to move for my mom's job"

"What does your mom do?"

"She is a doctor I hope to become one too."

_smart and sexy... I like_

"how about your parents?"

"umm well actually my dad is a rockstar and my mom is a gold digging whore"

"well...um... so it is only my first day at King and I already have a date for the

dance, He is really sweet and he knows my brother."

"What's his name?" asked a very curious and slighty pissed Ashley

"Aiden Dennison, why do you know him? "

"I may have seen him once or twice" _Once or twice yeah right thats about how_

_many times as he has seen his daughter_

"well he seems like a pretty nice guy and he is on the basketball team"

"really you don't say" _he blew off our daughter's birth to play basketball what an_

_ass._

They spent the rest of the afternoon talking about everything. Movies,

books, music and just life in general. Time flew by and before they knew it it was

already four o'clock. When Spencer saw the time she began to worry. _Great I_

_missed the cheerleading auditions well I guess there is always next year..._

"umm Ash can I see your phone I want to call my brother and tell him I am

going to be late" The brunette dug in her purse and handed her pink razor phone

to her friend.

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**So whatcha think?**


	5. Chapter 5

**Happy New year!**

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Chapter 5

Glen who is Spencer's older brother told her that she had to be back

at the school in a half hour or she would have to walk home. The drive home was

silent and akward Spencer had not gotten the chance to ask what she has been

wanting to ask since lunch.

_ok so Just say Are you gay... just like that...ok it is not that hard just 3 little_

_words_." umm...Ash can I ask you something kinda personal?" "sure

anything" "Um... are you... like uhh... um"

The brunette giggled a little to herself "Am I what a lesbian" "Well it is just that

what Madison said and the way you just stormed off..." " I'm not into labels I like

to think of myself as a girl who dates other girls Is that a problem?" The blonde

shook her head and her mind was racing. _Oh no I already know this going to be_

_trouble... I knew there was something different about her... Why am I so drawn to_

_her?_

When they arrived at the school Spencer got out of the car and rushed into the

gym to meet her brother. When she got there she found him shooting free throws

with none other then Aiden. He looked excited to see her and he must have been

because he rushed over to side in just the blink of an eye. " So umm where were

you at lunch Spence I didn't see you" "umm me and a friend decided to take the

afternoon off " she replied. "Oh you and who not another guy I hope" "No her name

is Ashley Davies" _Oh shit... Oh shit_ "Aiden are you ok" Asked the blonde who

was now starting to worry. "umm Yeah I'm fine... did you tell her we were going to

the dance together?" "uh yeah I think I mentioned it but she said she didn't know

you, why do you ask?" "No reason, ummm look I gotta go I'll see you tommorow

in Chem. " and with that he was off before she could say good-bye.

Once her brother finished 'hitting the showers' they both drove home with only

the sound of the radio playing. She wondered what to expect when they got home

she hoped that the school didn't call and say she was not in but she could come up

with some lame excuse if she needed to.

"So did you make any new friends today?" Spencer's mother Paula

asked. "Umm just one her name is Ashley Davies" "woo you mean THE Ashley

Davies?" asked glen from his comfortable spot on the sofa "how do you know

her?" Spencer asked "She's Aiden's baby momma, and she turned into a lesbian

after she got pregnant" "PREGNANT?! and a lesbian? Spencer I'm sorry but I can't

allow you to associate with that kind of person." "Mom Glen doesn't even know

what he's talking about If she had a baby she would have told me" that is when it

all clicked. _Oh my god that is HER baby... her baby with Aiden!_ "But she is a

lesbian?" paula's voice was harsh and it tore her daughter's heart. "She's not into

labels" "Wow ok Spencer I cannot choose your friends for you but I strongly

advise you to try to find some new friends...you wouldn't want people to think you

were a lesbian would you?" She pretended not to hear the question and began to

set the table. _If mom only knew..._


	6. Chapter 6

**Sorry I took a day off from updating, I was too tired from New Years.**

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Chapter 6

When Ashley arrived home she got the shock of her life. As she

climbed up the stairs she could hear the sound of a soft voice singing and she

knew it could not possibly belong to Janice.She slowly opened the door to the

nursery but nothing could prepare her for what she saw. In the rockingchair was

none other then... her mother. Slowly rocking back and forth singing a sweet song

with baby Jenna in her arms. The brunette had to pinch herself to make sure she

wasn't dreaming. _wow this is really happening_

"umm... your nanny decided to go home early today because she wasn't

feeling well and she was going to call you to come home but I didn't have plans for

the afternoon so I decided to watch her for you" The eldest Davies explained "I

guess I need a new nanny then huh? I'll go get the yellow pages" said the

brunette "well... I mean I could watch her for you... I don't have any plans and it

wouldn't be any trouble school gets out in a month anyway." Ashley couldn't

believe what she was hearing all she could do was nod.

"umm ok I'll take over from here mom you should take a little break" and with that she

took her mother's place in the rockingchair.

The next morning Ashley awoke peacefully because she had a full night's

sleep the night before. As soon as Jenna started to cry her mother rushed into the

nursery before her and she was convinced her mom had gone crazy. _Why is_

_she being all motherly... She was never a mother... this is scary. _However

weird it was Ashley returned to her bedroom and was able to drift into a happy

sleep.

By the time she had gotten to school it was almost time for first period.

She spotted a very familiar and might I add gorgeous blonde girl making out with

a certain jock from across the quad. Part of her hated Spencer for it, an even

bigger part of her hated Aiden for being a deadbeat dad, but the biggest part of

her was wishing she could be Aiden. At that very moment all she wanted was to

feel the soft lips of her blonde angel.

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**Kinda short... not the best but what do you think?**


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

That week went by surprisingly fast. Ashley was disgusted because

Spencer was now officially Aiden's girlfriend and whenever he came around they

both acted as if they didn't know each other. Spencer had yet to tell Aiden and

Ashley that she figured out their little secret. Tonight was the night of the dance

and as soon as school got out Spencer hurried home to get ready. She looked

beautiful in her tight black spaghetti strap dress that ended just above the knee.

The dress flattered every curve of her body and the black high heels were the

perfect addition.

Upon entering the dance before even looking for her date the blonde pulled

out her cell phone to call Ash. When Ashley picked up the phone the blonde could

hear the sound of a baby crying in the background. " Ash, tell me the truth, she is

your baby isn't she" "I never said she wasn't" was the only reply. "And Aiden is

her father?" "More like a sperm donor really, he has only seen her twice" The

brunette told her friend everything. How Aiden said he would always be there and

then he dumped her as soon as he found out. He wasn't there he wasn't at the

hospital when she was born and he wouldn't sign the birth certificate. He didn't

want to tell his parents so he thought if he ignored it that somehow it would just go

away.

Spencer was pissed. She walked into the dance and saw Aiden in the corner

flirting with Madison.Before she could control herself she walked right over to him

and sucker punched him in the face. Her eyes were so focused on the blood

running down his lip that she didn't notice the tears that were streaming down her own

face. After she realized what she had just done she ran out the doors of the as fast as

her heels would let her. She ran to house that she knew wasn't hers and she knocked

on the door.

"Aww she is so cute" said the blonde as she looked down at the baby laying

on her friend's bed. She turned her head slightly to the brunette "why didn't you

tell me?" "I was embarassed being a single teenage mother is not something you

brag about" " If I had a baby this cute everyone would know" She loved to watch

Spencer play Jenna. The blonde was the cutest thing in the world next to her

daughter of course and watching them interact just melted her heart.

Once Jenna was asleep Ashley and Spencer finally had some alone time.

They laid on Ashley's bed in silence until the blonde spoke up. " How did you know

you were gay?" "Umm... I guess a part of me always knew and I only dated Aiden

because I wanted to give it one last chance." " Have you ever been with a

girl?" Ashley was a little surprised by the question. "yeah, before I started to date Aiden I had my first time with

a girl. I knew that was what I wanted but I wanted to see if I had any interest in guys at all."

"how long were you and Aiden together before you slept with him?" " Like 2 weeks

but I didn't want to do it... I told him we should wait a little bit longer but he was so

charming and told me he loved me so I did it. It hurt and it was fast and I ended

up with a baby because of it now I don't bother with guys." Spencer laughed at

that.

It was getting late and it was time to go home. Clay who was Spencer's

oldest and adopted brother came to pick her up as soon as she called him. He

heard about what happened at the dance and she knew that she had made a name

for herself at King high.

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**So watcha think? Good? Long enough. Just so everyone knows I completed this story I jst choose to post it chapter by chapter. And there will be a sequel.**


	8. Chapter 8

**I decided to keep this fic because people kept telling me how much they liked it so I'm going to continue. It doesn't matter to me if you review I just thought that meant noone was reading it.**

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Chapter 8

As Spencer layed awake she couldn't get Ashley's words out of her

head. She too had always felt that she was well... different and she too had given

guys a chance. She had only one serious boyfriend and only one sexual

experience. She kept thinking back to that day when she gave herself to him, she

knew she didn't love him but she thought she could somehow fool herself into

thinking she did. She was wrong

The whole day was just pain and she always had an empty space inside of her

because she knew one day she would have to face the truth.

_Why did she ask me that question... curiosity or is it something more?... don't_

_get your hopes up if she was into girls she wouldn't have started dating Aiden..._

_but wait I did...this is too much I can't even begin to understand what is going_

_through my head I shouldn't get my hopes up._ With that she let out a soft sigh

and rolled over. She knew all her dreams that night would be about her blonde

angel.

Spencer couldn't sleep at all, and at about 3 o'clock she came up with a better

idea. She grabbed a piece of paper and wrote a letter.

**Ash,**

**I am writing this letter to tell you how I feel, but to be honest I don't know how I**

**feel. When I am with you I feel this rush come over me and I don't understand. I**

**have not even known you for a week but I feel so drawn to you. You are the first**

**thing I think of in the morinig and the last thing I think of at night. I have never**

**felt this way about anyone and I wonder if my feelings are wrong. Of course not if**

**there is one thing my dad has taught it's that your feelings are never wrong. But**

**then why do I feel so dirty when I am around you? I feel like I am doing**

**something wrong. My mom wants me to find new friends she thinks you are a bad**

**influence or something but to be honest I don't want any new friends I don't want**

**anyone but you. Oh my god did I really just write that? Once she meets you I**

**know she will love you. I am so confused right now but there is one thing I know. I**

**know that I want to be more then just your friend. I know that people in the past**

**have hurt you and I know you feel like you disapointed everyone. You never**

**disapointed me. I care about you a lot and if you ever need anything you know**

**you will always have me.**

**Spencer**

She quickly folded the note and stuffed it under her matress.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Things were tense between the girls when school started after the

weekend. They had both showed a side of themselves that they never showed

anyone. Even though they were more distant they somehow both knew that they

were closer.

Of course everyone was watching Spencer because half of the school saw her Mike

Tyson moment at the dance. By lunch time Spencer felt like she was naked in the

crowd, everyone was always looking at her and she needed to get out of there.

She grabbed a hold of Ashley's hand and pulled her to the parking lot. _Oh my_

_god she is holding my hand wow her hands are soft I wonder what kind of lotion_

_she uses._ "Spence what's going on?" " I just can't take it, you punch the star of

the basketball team ONE TIME and all of a sudden everyone stares." Ashley

knew the feeling. She got those stares everyday since she got pregnant. So

without another word they got into her car and drove to the brunette's house.

When they got there Ashley told her mom to take the day off and they

headed up to her room with Jenna. "wow your mom doesn't even care that you

skipped?" "My mom doesn't care if I'm breathing, So what do you want to do?"

" I don't know we could just talk"

After talking about everything and nothing the baby started to get cranky so

Ashley quickly ran downstairs to get a bottle, in the meantime leaving Spencer and

Jenna to amuse themselves for a few minutes. " So Jenna, it must be fun having

Ashley as your mom huh?" she giggled to herself because Jenna was only four

months old and she knew that the baby could neither talk back or understand but

for some reason she kept talking " you are just the cutest thing you know that? of

course you know that, you are so easy to talk to I could just get used to this"

When the brunette returned all she saw was a big lump under the covers and all

she heard was the sound of a baby giggling. When she pulled back the covers the

blonde said " Oh no she found us" and was answered by the sound of even louder

laughing from both girls. "Ok Jenna look what Momma has" Ashley exclaimed as

she waved the bottle in front of her face. " Oh can I feed her please?" begged the

blonde " Umm yea sure" As the blonde laid back to craddle and feed the baby

Ashley couldn't take her eyes off of them. She watched them both fall into a very

cozy sleep and decided the only thing she could do was lay with them.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Ashley woke up to find her head resting comfortably in the crook of

Spencer's neck. She also noticed that Jenna was no longer sleeping on the blonde,

somehow she had moved to the other side of the bed. Ashley noticed her own

arm covering the blonde's chest. She thought about getting up but instead she just

held her closer.

_I can feel her breathing on my neck, it is so hottttt!! Oh great I have a_

_crush on a girl good job Spence... Now what am I supposed to do._ So as

quickly and as quietly as she could she got up and left leaving a little note behind

**Ash,  
wasn't feeling well so I went home, I'll call you later**

**Spence.**

As soon as she left her mind started to race. It felt so right to wake up next to her.

Not only next to her but in her warm and peaceful embrace. _I know I can never_

_be more then just her friend it would be easier just to pretend to be normal rather_

_then have to deal with being gay.Normal everyone is always trying to be normal_

_what is normal anyway? Oh my god I am having a conversation with my mind._

She walked all the way home and by the time she got there it was dinner time.

Only these dinners in L.A are nothing like the ones back home, her mother was not

there and her brothers were out which left just her and her father.

"So honey how was school?" breaking out of her thoughts with the question

she simply said "fine" " Spence you seem a little off since we moved here is

something wrong" "Well dad it's just that we come to this new place with new

people and I just feel... Different you know?" after a long pause he finally broke

the silence "You are just trying to figure out who you are, and if you ever need

anyone to talk to I will always be here." without thinking she burst out "Dad I think

I'm gay..." _Oh no!!!! Did I just say that???!!!_

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**interesting?**


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

" I'm home" Paula said as she entered the kitchen

" Umm. Spence we can talk about that later ok"

"sure dad I'm going to go upstairs" as fast as she could she ran upstairs and slammed her

bedroom door behind her._ I can't believe I said that oh no what if he tells mom?_

Her heart was beating out of her chest she could hear it in her ears. She paced around the room

and thought of what she could do. After about five minutes of pacing back and forth she felt a

small vibration in her pocket so she reached in and pulled out her phone " Hello?..."

"what was that all about?" Paula asked her husband with a confused look on

her face. "She was just asking me for some advice on how to do a project

for...umm school" he hated to lie to his wife mostly because he knew she could

see right through him. _Does he think I am that stupid? Oh well I'll just play_

_along_ " Well I had an hour for dinner so I thought I would come home and see

you but after the traffic it is more like 40 minutes for dinner" she kissed her

husband lightly on the lips and then made herself a quick snack.

"She said it Spence, she actually said it!"

"what are you talking about Ash, who said what"

" Jenna She said Momma, she said my name!" the blonde couldn't

help but feel all warm inside. "That's great." she replied trying to sound as happy

as she could.But the brunette knew something was wrong "Spencer, what's wrong?"

"nothing I'm fine but I gotta go I'll talk to you later"

" Ok I hope you feel better."

"bye" and before she could answer, Ashley heard the click on the other line

of the phone.

As soon as paula left there was a knock at the door. "come in" Spencer said

half wishing that he wouldn't want to talk. "Spencer, about what you said

earlier...umm I was wondering if you wanted to talk about it." For some reason

unknown to her she said yes.

"Look sweetie it is ok if you feel that you may be... gay but I want to know exactly

what you are feeling so that I can understand and hopefully clear up some things

for you." She told him everything, how she felt about her friend , how she thinks

Ashley feels about her and she even showed him the letter.She knew the truth she

wanted Ashley and she was no longer in doubt. When she was finished telling him

that she asked him "Are you mad at me?" he put his head down and replied

"Of course I'm not mad but I do have one question for you"

"what?" she asked feeling more nervous then before

"What are you sitting around here for, go get your girl."


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

The walk to the Davies' house was only about 15 minutes long.

When Spencer arrived she waited on the porch for almost an hour trying to think

of what she was going to say_. Maybe start off with a compliment like Oh Ashley_

_that top looks good on you then what?_ She was concentrating so hard on her

thoughts that she didn't notice the door open up.

"How may I help you" It was Ashley's mom which was a good thing well maybe not

she was standing on her front porch at 9 o'clock at night. "Is Ashley here?" _Oh_

_god please say no I don't want to do this._ "sure she is up in her room go on up"

When she entered the house reality sunk in. _I am actually going to tell my best_

_friend who I have only known for a week that I am in love with her. Love? where_

_did that come from? It's true but I'm not going to say that._ Each time her foot

hit one of the steps it felt as if they weighed more and more. Her palms were

sweating and once again she could hear her heartbeat. She knocked ever so

lightly on the door and was greeted by a very surprised and very half naked

Ashley _well there goes the nice top compliment oh and there goes that ache_

_between my legs again...Just perfect._

"Did you forget something Spence?" The brunette asked confused but

pleasently happy as to why the blonde was standing at her door. "Uhh I just

wanted to talk to you but if you're busy I can come back" _Please say you're_

_busy please!!!!_ "Oh no come on in" They both sat on the bed and Spencer tried

to stop herself from looking at Ashley. She just couldn't stop looking at the black

lace bra the brunette was sporting. _Ok she has a staring problem and you know_

_it is bad when I get uncomfortable. _"So spence what did you want to talk

about" _your nipples poking out of your bra... no wait think Spencer you came_

_here to do something oh yeah the feelings thing ok you can do this_ "Uhh I

wanted to talk... about..you know stuff and other stuff " She mentally slapped

herself for her sudden stuttering problem. "Ok well hold that thought because if

you haven't noticed I just got out of the shower and I need to put some clothes

on" " Oh really I hadn't noticed" _yeah right you didn't notice_

When the brunette left the room it gave Spencer more time to think _Ok_

_I'm just going to give her the note._ She dug into her pocket and didn't feel it in

there. _Great I must have dropped it on the way here._


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

To Spencer's disapointment Ashley came back with clothes on. but

now she could focus on why she came. _She needs to know even if she doesn't_

_feel the same she still needs to know._ "Spence, I think I know why you came...

I freaked you out earlier didn't I?"

"no actually it didn't, I just wasn't expecting it and like I said in the note I wasn't feeling

well and" she was cut off by a pair of

soft lush lips being pressed against her own. " Did I freak you out now?" after a

long pause all the blonde could manage to say was a very squeaky no.

"Good so what did you want to talk about" she couldn't form words she still taste the sweet

brunette's lips on her own.

After a minute that seemed like hours to ashley she finally heard her blonde angel

speak. "Ashley, I came here to tell you that I want you!"_ I should really see a_

_doctor about those outbursts._ " Um.. wow I really was hoping you wouldn't say

that Spence, I can't" Her heart was broke, She felt like she was going to throw up.

_How could I have been wrong? What do I do now?_ She did the only thing she

could do. She ran away.

The walk home only took about a third of the time that it took to get there.

When she entered the door and ran up the stair, she did'nt even notice the folded

note on the ground.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

Sleep didn't come that night for the blonde. She knew she had

school the next morning but she just couldn't close her eyes. She rolled over onto

her side and noticed a folded piece of paper had been slipped under her door.

Little did she know on the other side of the door was her mother, Paula sitting on

the ground sobbing into her hands. Once the woman calmed down she lightly

knocked on her daughter's door. Not waiting for the ok she walked into the room

and closed the door behind her.

_I didn't mean to hurt her, I didn't know she would run away. It's for her_

_own good I did it because I love her or I care about her or ...I don't know what I_

_feel._ Unlike her friend the brunette was able to fall asleep without any trouble.

As she walked closer to the door Spencer knew she had read the note but

couldn't read the expression on her pale face. Her eyes were bloodshot and her lip

had a slight twitch. "Mom are you ok? what's wrong" She knew what was wrong

she knew she had done the only thing her mother would never forgive her for. She

knew she had broken her mom's heart and when her mom sat beside her she lost

all control. She burried herself in her mother's chest and started to sob

uncontrolably. " How could you Spencer? How could you do this to me to our

family" The sobbing stopped and the blonde slowly lifted her head from her

mother's chest. " I didn't do this to our family. Do you have any idea how

hard this is for me? I have been struggling with this for years and you think I did

this just to hurt you? Do you have any idea how bad I am hurting, I just told

Ashley I wanted to be with her and I got rejected. I should have known I would

never be good enough for her."

" Of course you're good enough, no wait Spencer you are better then her you deserve a

nice boy who will treat you with respect."

She thought long and hard for a moment and decided to finally say it

" Mom I am a lesbian"


	15. Chapter 15

Just to lete everyone know the rating will be moved up to M soon.

* * *

**Chapter 15**

Ashley had cried herself to sleep the night before but she had

bigger problems coming her way. As she was walking down the stairs she knew

something was not right she could just feel it in the air. She went into the kitchen

for a less then healthy breakfast but instead was greeted by the eldest davies

passed out on the floor.

As quickly as she could she grabbed the phone off the kitchen counter and

dialed 911. Before they got there she ran up the stairs to grab jenna and packed

a diaper bag. Once the paramedics arrived about 10 minutes later and took her

mother while she followed in her car.

When they arrived in the emergency room her mother was quickly

taken to a room by the EMT driver. This made Ashley even more nervous she

didn't understand how her mom could be so healthy one minute and was being

rushed to the emergency room the next. The hospital was a creepy place and

Ashley did not like the feel of it. Of course who does like being in a hospital? She

didn't want to think of all the things that could be going wrong at that moment it

had been two hours and noone told her what was happening.

* * *

'Beep Beep BEEEEEEEEEEP' the blonde reached her hand out

from under the covers and smashed it down on the button. She promised

her mother that she would go to the hospital and eat breakfast with her this

morning and that way they could talk. She would have rather gone to school but

her mother insisted. The blonde quickly took a shower, got dressed, and walked to

the hospital to see her mom.

" Hey Beth do you know where my mother is? " asked the blonde to a

nearby nurse. "She is with a patient but you can wait in the waiting room for her."

With a nod she walked towards the waiting room.

The first thing she saw when she entered the waiting room was her very sleep

friend. _I must be dreaming pinch me now oh wait no don't pinch me I like_

_dreaming about her_. But it wasn't a dream and as soon as Ashley saw the

blonde she rose to her feet and tangled her in a big hug. _Ow bones crushing ow_

_pain_ When she finally pulled back there were tears streaming down her face.

Worried the blonde quickly wiped them away with her thumbs.

" What happened, Is everything alright?" She asked almost to quickly to understand.

" My mom" was all she could get out between sobs.

" Is she ok?" the brunette shrugged her shoulders then walked over to her seat.

" Wait what are you doing here Spence? Are you ok?"

" My mom works here remember she is a doctor?" That must have been the magic word

because her mother appeared.

" Spencer Umm... I can't take my break just yet would you mind waiting about a few more minutes?"

" Sure mom, oh by the way this is Ashley and her daughter Jenna"

_hmm yea I know who you are_ "Oh nice to meet you" her mother replied trying to manage a fake smile.

_I shouldn't be this nice to her,_ Spencer thought _but her mother is in the hospital so..._

_besides just cause she doesn't want to be with me doesn't mean we can't still be_

_friends... right?_


	16. Chapter 16

Since I have not updated in a while, I decided to post 2 chapters.**

* * *

**

**Chapter 16**

Her train of thought was interupted by her mother grabbing her and

pulling her into the nurse's lounge. "Oww mom what are you doing" She asked as

she pulled away and rubbed the red mark on her wrist.

" Spencer I don't want you talking to her, she is the one who got you into this mess,

playing with head making you think you were well you know."

" What mom she made me think I was a what? LESBIAN trust me I don't need her to make

me feel that way and I don't need you to make me feel like shit. I don't care Dad loves me

and that is all I need...he understands" Paula looked down embarassed for a moment then

looked back to her daughter

" Please keep your voice down. You are my daughter and I love you, but she has a baby I don't

want that kind of influence on you I don't want you dating some trash who is stupid enough

to get herself pregnant."

She could sense the anger in her mother's voice and decided not to argue back.

"Mom I'll meet you in the cafeteria in 20 minutes."

When she went back into the waiting room Ashley was already back to

sleep. Feeling the comfort of her friend she was able to drift into a dreamless sleep

once again. She didn't want to wake her friend but when the taller girl looked over

to see Jenna wide awake she knew she had no choice. She gently shook the

brunette to wake her but only to ask if she could take Jenna to the cafeteria with

her. _She must be so tired it is the least I can do._


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17**

Of course her mother was unhappy but she didn't care. She loved

Jenna as much as she loved Ashley and she was going to be a part of both of their

lives. She just wasn't sure what part. Her mother knew that she would date girls

no matter what so maybe it was better for her to date Ashley. Sure the brunette

was wild and had a baby but at least she was responsible. She was taking care of

her baby with very little help from anyone. Paula knew she could not handle

half of what Ashley had gone through in her life. Looking over and seeing her

daughter taking care of a baby that she so obviously cared about made her realize

something. _She's not my baby anymore. She is all grown up. She knows what_

_she wants and even if I don't agree with it, I have to support it. I don't want to_

_lose my only daughter and if getting close to her again means accepting Ashley_

_and her baby then so be it._

" Spence, do you mind if I hold her, It's been so long since I held a baby?"

Holding Jenna in her arms she knew everything was going to be ok.

_Yeah we are going to get along just fine._

" Spencer go upstairs and talk to Ashley"

" What how come you want me to talk to her? Am I being punk'd?"

" I had a change or heart so take Jenna and go talk to Ashley make sure she is

ok "

Before her mother could have another change of heart she ran up to the waiting

room to find it empty. " Hey Beth did you see that brunette girl that was sleeping

here? "

"Yeah the nurse called her in to see her mother she should be back soon "

_Oh right her mom_ "Is her mom ok?" The nurse looked around and whispered

" She will be fine but you didn't hear it from we can only release that info to the family"

The blonde nodded and added a wink.


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18**

It seemed like hours later when Ashley finally returned to sit by her

friend and daughter.

" So she is gonna be fine just a panic attack too much

stress."

Feeling more relieved Ashley decided it was time to talk about the real

issue.

"Spence you know you are my best friend and you mean a lot to me but I

just think you and me are better as just friends you know?"

not waiting for a reply she added "I do like you, but I don't want to risk losing you"

the taller girl nodded understanding what her friend was saying. She never wanted to

lose Ashley but she didn't want to be just a friend. _I know I can treat her the way she deserves_

_I want to be the one she depends on and what about when she starts dating_

_someone else I don't think I could handle it. But I will make these feelings go_

_away some how they will it justs takes time._

So there she was on a Friday night getting ready to go to the club where her best

friend was performing. _She is the one performing why am I so nervous?_

There was a knock on the door and the blonde almost leaped out of her seat.

When she opened the door her draw dropped. She was sure she had never seen

anything so hott in her life.

_I guess it worked Ashley davies you have done it again._ The older girl knew

exsactly what she was doing, she wanted to make Spencer's head spin and from

the looks of it her job was done.

The brunette was wearing a Tight black button up semi-long sleeved shirt which

was only buttoned three times on purpose accompained by a short pink plaid

skirt . _Hmm looks like those buttons are getting ready to snap and what a treat_

_no bra._


End file.
